Willing Hearts and Hands

I have alluded to this before, but it is something that I have been thinking about a lot lately. I am using extremes, but that is for emphasis. This is a generalization. 

That is: the pride with which the Albanian women care for their families and for their home. 

Perhaps I had a warped perspective in America, and I am only realizing that by being Albania. Or perhaps many in America do have a warped perspective that infiltrates the culture. So whether it is me, or American culture in general, I am not sure, but this is what has challenged me in the last 8 months: 

For an Albanian woman taking care of her family is her sole job. Many do take jobs outside of the home in order to support their family. But the goal is one and the same. 

Her mind is entirely wrapped up in this endeavor. 

Every single day she makes (from scratch) breakfast, lunch and dinner for her family. 

Every single day she sweeps and mops her entire house. 

Every single day she does laundry and hangs it out to dry. 

Every single day she shops for groceries and/or home goods. 

She doesn't have a dryer or a dishwasher. 

She does have a wood stove. 

In the fall, she cans fruit and vegetables to get them through the summer. 

Throughout the year, she sews, knits and weaves, rugs, clothes and doilies to give her daughter when she gets married. 

In the summer, she prepares for winter. 

Can you say Proverbs 31? 

And while this absolutely challenges me, there is something greater that has hit home. 

It is the attitude with which she does this. The pride, the joy, the determination. 

She does not view it as a burden.

She does not view it as something that must be done so that she can do the things she really wants to.

It is not a "sacrifice."

She views it as a calling, a mission and a privilege. 

She makes no excuses because she doesn't need to. 

Her home is always ready for guests. 

Her day is always full but she is never stressed by what needs to be done. 

Because she plans, she prepares, and she prioritizes.

And again. It is a calling, a mission and a privilege. 

This convicts me because sometimes I look at my home and the work it takes as a burden not as a joy. 

I think; I just washed this dish, I just mopped this floor, I just changed her diaper. 

More than that, it challenges me to strive to be better. 

To plan for the week better. To be more strategic about my shopping. To be efficient with my time. 

Not to be a perfectionist. Not to find my identity. 

But to do my job well as unto the Lord. 

I understand that every day is not perfection. Obviously. 

But it is the heart and mindset behind it. 

I am privileged to have a home to take care of. 

It is a joy to make meals for my family. 

And if I take pride in my home like these women do, I will naturally strive to be better. 

And ironically I have seen this in a godless culture. Biblical principals in a place where no one has a Bible. 

And of course I knew this, technically.

But it has been amazing and challenging to see it lived out in this way. 

Women's Bibles study last week

In Shiloh with Shiloh

5 years ago (January 17 to be exact) I met Cory in New Jersey on the way to Israel. 

We studied there for 4 months. 

It was a life changing semester. Not only because I met Cory, but also because of everything I learned and saw while I was there. 

Cory and I constantly talk about our time in Israel. Memories, lessons we learned, places we saw, arguments we had...

When we first talked to President of JV about joining JV, Cory described the kind of country he would like to serve in. Not Israel, but like Israel. Like Jerusalem. 

In our memory, Jerusalem is full of chaos and disorder. There are loud shopkeepers barking at you to come look in their store. There are cats EVERYWHERE that look like they've been on tumble dry for 2 hours. The smell of nasty incense and exotic spices fills the air. 

This last week we had the opportunity to go back to Israel. We had the most amazing time. We are so thankful, privileged and blessed. We realize that Israel is a once in a lifetime opportunity and the fact that we have been there multiple times is a gift! 

We went to all of our favorite places in Jerusalem. 

However, it was such a different place than the place of our memories. 

It seemed cleaned. It seemed orderly. It seemed Westernized. 

The shopkeepers were quieter. The smells less offensive. The cats less disgusting. 

And we missed Albania. We missed all the things we hate. We missed the people. We missed the language. We missed the culture. We missed the chaos. 

And that is the Lord. He has given us a love for this place that I can't even really logically explain. And even though I sometimes hate it, I actually love it. And I shouldn't love it. I grew up in Southern California. I am way out of my comfort zone. I am far from what I know. But this place and these people are so dear to me. 

Here is Shiloh in Shiloh. She slept the whole entire time and this was the best pic we got. Shiloh is where Hannah prayed to the Lord for a son. Shiloh is where the Ark of the Covenant when Israel came into the Promised Land. Shiloh is where Samuel heard God's voice. Her name has many meanings but the one that we love is "That which belongs to Him." 

This is at the Dead Sea with my sweet sisters. I had the best time with them and it was so fun to watch them with Shiloh. She LOVES them. The weather here was also amazing and we were able to thaw out a little bit. 

The Mount of Olives is behind us in this picture. It's crazy to think that Shiloh won't remember any of this. She was however, a TROOPER the whole time. She barely napped, ate lots of pita, and was strapped to Cory's back the whole time. She oohed and ahhed at everything she saw and loved being on the go. She is seriously better behaved when we are out than when we are home. 

Taliah was also a trooper and we are 27 weeks today! This pregnancy is flying by. 

Shiloh loved all the colors in the Old City market and pointed at everything she saw. 

Here they are...best buddies. Shiloh's word of choice right now is "GO" and she says it when we sing "Let it Go." Over and over again in a sing-song voice. She sang in Cory's ear the whole week "Gooo, goo, goo," in her cute little voice. 

We are so thankful for the time we were able to spend in Israel. It was encouraging, refreshing and a blessing to be with my family. There are more pics on my Instagram as well. 

Now, we are back home and in the swing of things. Well, Shiloh has to relearn how to play by herself...which is so fun. 

Today, Cory had some boys over to play Settlers of Catan and he taught them and played the game speaking only Albanian! 

In my girls bible study today we talked about the man who was healed at the pools of Bethesda and it was special to be able to tell them I had just been to that very place! 

The next few months before Taliah comes, we are kicking our language lessons into high gear and having our teacher come 5 days a week. Here we go! 

As we ate dinner together tonight, we were talking about how thankful we are to live here, how much we love these people and this place, and how excited we are for what is to come! 

Frozen

There is no theme or story to this blog but I want to keep up even for my own documentation. I'm sure that in years to come I will look back on these early posts with thankfulness and embarrassment and it will remind me of the journey the Lord has taken us on. 

*I can see my breath in the bathroom. Yes it's that cold. 

I had to unfreeze our water pipes this morning because no water would come out of the faucet. You do this by boiling water and then dumping it on the pipe outside. Yes it's that cold. 

If you had told me I would be doing that I would have said "Not a chance." Normally, my sweet husband would do this for me, but he has been sick for two days. 

I watch out my kitchen window during the day because people slip on the ice repeatedly. I know that's bad, but it's actually hilarious. Watching people fall. It's one of those things you shouldn't laugh at but can't help it. Like when your baby screams in your face with her fists clenched...her eyes so big that they look like they'll pop out. 

I found out today from the girls in my bible study that their schools are not heated. 

Sometimes they are heated for only 1 hour a day. I was shocked. They literally sit in class all day with their coats, gloves, scarves and hats on. They can barely write. 

The buildings are made of cement which is almost worse than being outside. The sun helps it a bit when you are outside but inside it's just cold, stagnant air. Like a freezer. 

I know that there are many places in America that are colder than this. But the difference is that nothing is heated here. 

You don't walk out of your heated house and get into a heated car and run into a heated store. 

They walk out of their semi-heated one room, into the cold, where they walk, sometimes miles, to the store, that is not heated. The people who work in the stores are literally faceless because they are so bundled. 

There are women who sit outside ALL day selling carrots. And there were days last week where it was 19 degrees. AND there is a wind chill because we are on a LAKE. So basically it's like -400 degrees. 

The funniest thing about all of this is that I HAD NO IDEA. 

I think the Lord knew it wouldn't help me to know. Now I am just kind of rolling with the punches. Everyone around me is acting like it's normal and they actually are way worse off than me too. 

I don't sit outside all day and sell green onions for 10 cents. 

I don't sit in school all day watching my breath. 

I don't even have to put firewood on the fire because we have a pellet stove. 

And I understand there are much worse things than being cold...but not really to me. I mean I'm exaggerating, but not. 

So I don't hate it like I thought I would mostly because I feel so thankful for what I do have. I really have no reason to complain and I'm actually really surprised that I can honestly say that. 

**Albanian is going well. I hear more every day. Except I have essentially been saying all week, "These boys are my sisters." No wonder everyone looks at me funny when I introduce the twins. 

We have had the best time with them and I'm so thankful that I've gotten to watch their first overseas experience. Cory has had a fever and Shiloh has been a snotty faucet but I'm so glad the twins have been here to help me and keep me company. 

***I was thinking again today about the question, "What do you do every day?" Or "What do your days look like?" 

A very valid question for a missionary wife and mom to be asked. 

The last two days I have been taking care of my sick family. 

I have wiped Shiloh's snotty nose too many times to count. I have shoved nasal spray in her nostrils while the twins hold her arms down. 

I have made chicken noodle soup which took a long time because I had to roast the chicken and then make the broth. It better be as good for you as everyone says. 

I have made cookies for bible study and had women and girls in my home. 

I have done laundry and washed dishes and wiped up the floor because Shiloh likes to throw her food to indicate she has finished. 

I have thawed pipes and flipped the electricity back on and restarted the washing machine. 

I haven't done anything really great or important or "spiritual." 

I've been a wife and a mom. And it's been very consuming. 

So many days look like that. No matter where you are. 

And I was reminded of the freedom that comes from obeying the simple commands of Jesus. 

It is freeing to know that I am being faithful to the Lord by taking care of my family, even if it means I haven't studied Albanian or spent time with any girls. 

7 months ago we left Seattle to come to Albania. I cannot believe how full these months have been. I wouldn't trade them for anything and I feel so privileged and blessed. 

****There are times where I don't feel so privileged and blessed....like New Years Eve. 

We were in a war zone. 

Everyone lights off their own fireworks for 3 hours. Like the sparks (or whatever they are called) were actually hitting my kitchen widow. They launch them off their balcony straight at other buildings. 

Our house shook. 

Actually this has been happening all month. It took me a week to figure out what was going on. I was wondering who was shooting a gun all day. 

But it was nothing like New Years Eve. 

I was actually mad at them. I was trying to sleep (yes I go to sleep before midnight on New Years Eve, always have, probably always will) and I was thinking "What is wrong with these people????" 

This is NOT fun. This is NOT a celebration. This is NOT ok. 

Of course my brother Kyle thought it was awesome. (Yes he visited as well and we had THE BEST time and I've been completely spoiled this Christmas). 

So...I am kind of like a roller coaster. In love with Albania and their traditions and then the next day wanting to just yell at everything. 

I actually had the idea of getting an air soft gun for next year to pelt the little boys outside my house who light these "pupafkas" while Shiloh is sleeping. 

*****Today with the girls we talked about the Samaritan woman at the well. They were impacted by the fact that Jesus knew everything about the woman but still spoke to her and offered her living water. It's amazing to watch them hear these stories for the first time. 

On Thursday, we will head to Israel for a week with my family and a group from one of our supporting churches in California. We are SO excited and so thankful for this opportunity! 

Israel is our favorite place in the world. 

We met there. We spent 4 months studying there. 

And there is nothing like walking where Jesus walked and seeing the Bible in real life. Literally nothing like it.

5 years ago we met there. It's amazing to think about all that has happened since then! 

******Here we are, looking so happy and cozy...